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About Russ

GIVING PARENTS THE TOOLS THEY NEED TO HELP THEIR PRODIGAL TEENS

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I never imagined that I would be the nightmare husband...

There are three types of men in the world. One type learns from books. One type learns from observations. And one type has to urinate on the electric fence. I happen to be the last type. Maybe you can relate…

I was married just before my 30th birthday, and entered family life with visions of Mayberry and “happily ever after” dancing in my head. Not even close.

There was conflict in our marriage from day one, and when our eldest son was born 9 months later, I found being a new dad to be amazingly difficult. I discovered ugliness in myself that I didn’t know I had. I was selfish, angry…mean. I wasn’t the great, heroic leader that I had envisioned. This marriage and family thing was hard! Bloody hard! I was failing miserably!

I thrived at work, both as a pastor and a top sales rep, winning many awards. But, meanwhile, at home I wasn’t winning ANY awards. There was conflict, anger, unfaithfulness, marital separations, and even several nights in jail. It wasn’t a pretty picture.

I have a core belief that if you are not winning AT HOME, with your most precious people, you’re not winning AT ALL. And for years, I was losing the battle at home. This is true of so many of us, particularly men.

I have another core belief that “Nothing changes UNLESS Something changes.” In November of 2015, I woke up to the fact that things could not continue as they were. Something had to change. I had to change. So I determined to change. And things got worse, a lot worse, before they got better. But ever so slowly, things got better. It took an immense amount of work, the assistance of a coach, the re-wiring of my mind, learning new behaviors, a lot of prayer, and God’s supernatural help…but things began to turn around. Little by little, I began to change.

Today, my wife and I enjoy each other more than we ever have, and are building a marriage that is honorable. We have walked through our youngest son’s drug addiction and have become stronger and wiser for it. We are now serving together, helping others who are struggling just as we have. We will celebrate our 27th Anniversary this year. 

My relationship with my three children is growing steadily and becoming healthier and healthier. I am grateful for second chances. The future is bright. The hard work is paying off. God is so good.

My friend, I have learned much on this journey, both through failure AND success, and have acquired some hard-earned wisdom that will significantly help you as you strive to be a great husband and father. It would be my pleasure to share it with you!ws 

Russell De Vos

Certified Life & Leadership Coach

About Russ

Certified Leadership Coach with The John Maxwell Team

Russ is the proud husband of Heather for the past 26 years, and the father of Sam (25), Hannah (daughter-in-law, 25), Lily (23) and Simon (22)…and grand-daugher, Lyla (5 months)!

Russ was the founding pastor of Oasis Church, in Bend, Oregon, a church plant in 2004 that grew from 17 to over 1500 people in 3 years. 

After pastoring, Russ went into sales, and was the #1 Salesman for the 6th largest Home Improvement company in the U.S.A., breaking all standing sales records.

He was also an Oregon State Wrestling Champion at 191 lbs., wrestled on scholarship in college, and has coached High School wrestling for 6 years. Much of his story and who he is flows out of these 3 experiences. 

Russ has experienced BOTH the thrill of victory AND the agony of dark defeat, as a man, a husband, and as a father, and founded The Catalyst Coaching in 2018 to work with men who are struggling like he has, and has now shifted his focus to work with parents who are experiencing chaos and turmoil because of a prodigal teen. 

He currently resides in Seattle, WA., between 2 amazing bodies of water: Lake Washington and the Puget Sound…and is constantly amazed at the glory of God’s Creation! 

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